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Thursday, 21 August 2014

A new me

Something has happened to me that is most unexpected. For the first time in many years I have no pain in my innards and none in my back. I feel utterly amazing as if twenty years has been given back to me somehow.

The steady plod, plod, plod of walking for hundreds of miles has worn away at the years of fat that has weighed me down in so many ways and I feel physically renewed and invigorated. Just for fun I did thirty press ups, just for fun I ran, something that has dogged my dreams for years, just for fun I grabbed a tree brach to do pull ups and just for fun I did sit ups.

The walking meditation part of my journey is more difficult to pin down though. I have been practicing meditation techniques to clear my mind of the thoughts that have caused me so much pain. Walking in this heat needs a hat so I have a wide brimmed Australian style hat that obscures much of the view ahead for much of the day. I have to force myself to look up to see the road and so my point of view encompasses hat brim, road, shoes and diminished, ha greatly diminished belly.

I have no requirement to do anything except to walk. How far I walk is determined by Jeremy's cajoling and by the state of my feet. I eat when I want to eat. I drink when I want to drink and I answer to no one for times, schedules, requirements or demands. This is the only way I feel I can exist at the moment because all else is too much and I dissolve into almost catatonic depression again if I allow myself to brood.

Will the therapy of the road do as much for my mind as for my body? Who can say? I wish it would.



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